If songbirds ruled the planet

A little fun on this wet and windy Friday.

• Humming would be prohibited, unless you are a hummingbird.
• All “tweeting” would be required to have a melody
• Cats would be required to live only indoors and must be declawed and de-fanged.
• Spring migration could only start when it stays warm (in some places, this means never).
• Choir practice is mandatory starting one hour before sunrise and not concluding until sunset. No exceptions!
• Worms and flying insects are mandatory for breakfast – the earlier the better or the worms.
• Squawking is prohibited – we sing, not squawk.
• Birdman of Alcatraz and The Birds would be required entertainment.
• Bird-in-Hand, Pennsylvania must be renamed as Two-in-a-Bush.
• Being a bird brain would be a good thing.
• All feeders must be cleaned once a day so we don’t keep eating our own droppings – tasty as they are.
• The Navy and Air Force would be required to carry us across large bodies of water during migration so we do not have to flap our wings so damn much.
• Those who sing off-key will be forced to listen to endless duets by Michael Bolton and Roseanne Barr.

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Our odd behavior

While packing my things for a quick weekend trip to my step-niece’s wedding, I realized that at the same time I was cleaning and straightening my apartment. The more I thought about it, I realized that I have been doing this for years, as my parents did before me.

What possesses us to clean and straighten up our abode (or nest) before leaving town and not while we are there?

• So any potential robbers will be impressed by how neat and clean we are?
• To make the furniture content?
• To assure it looks acceptable to the dog sitter?

Heck if I know for sure. My best guess is we do it because we are sorting things anyway to pack and who wants to be faced with an untidy home when we walk in the door after a long trip. It also probably stems from not wanting to come home and find little pests have discovered your untidiness and have decided to through a party.

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Fun Friday, early edition: bike parking on campus

Couldn’t resist posting this hilarious cartoon today. Thanks for sharing, Ned. Enjoy!

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Fun Friday: “Here comes the sun…dog”

My cellphone photo of a beautiful, albeit fairly small “sundog” seen over Greater Lansing, Michigan on Thursday afternoon, December 1, 2011. Way cool! And yes we do have snow on the ground after getting 8-10 inches on Tuesday night and another inch last night. Hard to believe it was 65F last Friday.

A weblink is provided for more details on sundogs.

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Injustice(s) on our streets

Source: rawstory.com

This poignant photograph above from the University of California at Davis over the past weekend speaks volumes. It shows the loathsome and deplorable treatment that many Occupy protesters are now receiving in cities across the country. What I am wondering is why are they being singled out for brutal tactics when the Tea Party protests were far more disruptive and dangerous?

Occupy Wall Street and similar groups are peaceful protesters that are making political statements about social and economic injustice through non-violent means. They have been accosted, beaten, roughed-up, jailed, and pepper-sprayed for doing nothing other that occupy space. Meanwhile, Tea Party protesters quite often disrupted public meetings and forums held by elected officials and some openly carried weapons to outdoor events, but they got handled with kid gloves. Sorry for my French folks, but this is hypocritical bullshit with a capital B.

The right to peaceful assembly is embedded in our Constitution. The Occupy movement has been using such peaceful means to protest the social and economic injustices that are rampant in our plutocratic America. It was the Tea Party, not Occupy, that used disruptive and aggressive means to achieve their goals – the Tea Party are the ones who should have faced charges and jail time, not the Occupy movement.

What makes me the most disappointed is the federal government has not stood up for the Occupy movement. Why isn’t the Justice Department hauling mayors and police departments into court? Why isn’t President Obama strongly speaking out against the treatment of the Occupy movement? It was many of the participants in the Occupy movement of today who helped bring about President Obama’s election victory in 2008. Sadly, as a result they may very well abandon him during the 2012 election campaign in the same manner that his administration has apparently abandoned them in their time of need.

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Fun Friday: Recycling in Spartan style

Below is a photograph of a cool “Sparty ” outfit created entirely of recycled items by the MSU Recycling Center. No matter which school you are supporting for the big game tomorrow between Michigan and Michigan State, this is a great way to promote recycling and support MSU at the same time. Kudos to the recycling center for a great idea.

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Fun Friday – A benefit (NOT) of environmental degradation

Found this on Tumblr. As an allergy sufferer, I can certainly relate to the joke, but would never want to see it actually happen.

Source: "The Funny Times" via tumblr.com

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Fun Friday: If d-a-c-h-s-h-u-n-d-s ruled the world.

• The term “wiener dog” would be outlawed.

• All furniture would be required to be no more than 12 inches above the ground, including dinner tables so it is easier for us to scrounge for between meal snacks.

• All cities named Frankfort must change their name to Frankfurt.

• Frankfurt, Germany would be the world capital.

• The term “hot dog” can only be used to describe how rad we are – the food “hot dog” would be revised to “tubular treat.”  (Believe me – I could have gone down some slippery slopes with this one.)

• A single clip-on roller skate would be formed-fitted so our bellies do not drag on the ground.

• Dorky would be decreed as a positive attribute.

• The national sport would be badger hunting.

• The University of Wisconsin would be required to change its mascot to the skunk, because all badger’s stink.

• They would be unilaterally declared grand champion at all dog shows – forget those prissy poodles and annoying fluff balls.

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Fun Friday: A ‘Grand’ river holiday weekend

Downtown Lansing will be hopping this holiday weekend with the Michigan Mosaic Music Festival and the Capital City Dragon Boat Race taking place along the riverfront. If you live in Greater Lansing or are visiting the area (or state) this holiday weekend, stop by and check out both events. They should be great fun.

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Fun Friday – Fun new NFL/CFL team names

Below is my list of fun (mostly unrealistic) names for possible future NFL and CFL expansion teams. And yes, I realize some of these places may never get a team – that is why this is fun.

Austin “Bat Caves” or “Heat Strokes”

Birmingham “Blast Furnaces”

Columbia “Pictures”

Columbus “Middle C” (look at a map)

Davenport “Sofas”

Des Moines “Corners”

Halifax “Similes” (think about it)

Hartford “Agents”

Honolulu “Surfer Dudes”

Las Vegas “Strips”

Lincoln “Logs”

Little Rock “N’ Rollers”

Los Angeles “Losers”

Louisville ”Juleps” (a team name that’s ‘mint’ to be)

Macon “Bacon”

Madison “Avenues”

Memphis “Belles”

Mobile “Homes”

Montgomery “Gentry”

Oklahoma City “Sonics” (the restaurant not the old NBA team)

Omaha “Sodbusters” (my favorite)

Orlando “Tony’s” (not the award, the singer)

Portland “Pedalers”

Raleigh “Bicycles”

Richmond, VA ”Earthquakes”

Salt Lake City “Altos”

San Antonio “Buckshot”

Spokane “Words” (think about it)

Tidewater “Torpedoes”

Tucson “Cacti”

Tulsa “Twisters”

Victoria “Secrets” (uniforms should be interesting)

Wichita “Linemen”

Windsor “Knots”

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