If sharks ruled the earth

• I thought they already did?
• The world would be a lot more chummy.
• Razor-sharp teeth would be a fashion statement for more than just vampires.
• Steven Spielberg would be required to change the conclusion Jaws and its sequels.
• Vampires wouldn’t be the only blood-thirsty ones running around.
• Being a loan shark would be an important honor.
• Vegetarianism and veganism would be outlawed.
• Drift nets would be banned (a good thing).
• The San Jose Sharks would have to play their hockey games in an aquarium to standing caudal fin only crowds.
• “Sink your teeth into that one” and “getting hammered” would have whole new meanings.
• Shark fin soup would be replaced by person toenail soup.
• Piranha’s would be made goodwill ambassadors.
• Everyone must drive a Barracuda or a Stingray.
• All vacations must be taken to a coral reef where guests are invited to be…ahem, for dinner.
• When our friends in the U.K. say the term “bloody” they will darn well mean it.
• “Shark Week” would be every week on the Discovery Channel.

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